


Things that happen

by a17tabris



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-20
Updated: 2010-01-20
Packaged: 2017-10-06 12:08:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a17tabris/pseuds/a17tabris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sokka meets a cave. They don't get along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things that happen

**Author's Note:**

> Title is unrecognizably taken from the aborted attempt by Jim Steinman at a Batman musical: "There are things that happen only in the dark."

Sokka had finally collected enough evidence in the matter, and he was ready to come to a conclusion. Scientifically speaking, caves just kind of sucked.

Not ice caves, mind you. Those helpful little shelves under which you could hide from raging blizzards, or raging penguins, or raging sisters? They were pleasant enough. Friendly, even. The real problems began when you started making caves out of rocks.

From the very beginning, rock-caves and Sokka hadn't gotten along.

Admittedly, the evidence in that case was unclear. He'd been so busy not getting along with hippies, and darkness, and giant death-monsters that his poor relationship with the cave might have just been a result of them both being in a bad mood. But in the intervening time, it had become clear. Sokka and caves were just not meant to be.

And not in the ridiculous way like when a pretty girl said it, or in the painful way like when he thought of princess Yue. It just wasn't meant for Sokka and caves to exist in the same world. Caves, of course, had to be the ones to go. Up until now, they'd been able to peacefully coexist. Sure, fine, there'd been some blasting through walls on his side, some the-ground-just-opening-up-and-swallowing-him on the other side, but they hadn't had to come to outright war.

It was a shame, really. Caves had been a respectable adversary, and Sokka would be sad to see them go.

Well, not really. But that seemed like the kind of noble sentiment proper to a war hero such as he was.

When it really came down to it, the problem with caves was the darkness. And the sharp bits. And the sudden changes in elevation. And the combination of the three, that left you hanging on a sharp bit after falling off of a ledge you couldn't see. Which was, all things considered, not an appropriate position for a man of Sokka's dignity. And so, caves would have to go.

Or, he admitted after a few more minutes of serious thought on his situation, he would have to.

"Aang!" He called the Avatar again. "Toph!" If they hadn't heard him by now, they probably weren't coming. And the rock he was holding on to was way sharper than rocks ought to be. He made a mental note to speak to Zuko about rock sharpness regulations. If he ever saw him again, and didn't die in a stupid cave.

Aang was just too persuasive for anyone's good. They'd been having a nice picnic in the fields of Di Po Sichuan to celebrate some milestones in the rebuilding process, and the airbender- even if he was the master of all four elements, there was no way his personality let you think of him as anything but an airbender- had noticed that they were right near one of the hundred mouths of Gun Lian cave. And suggested they go "exploring".

And now he was about to die. That was him. Sokka, the guy who died on a picnic. That was what it would say on his tombstone.

Sokka of the Water Tribe.  
Born 96 BA - Picnicked to death 2 AA.

Not a pretty sight.

Tombstones. More rocks. Sokka was getting profoundly sick of rocks. And it was becoming clearer and clearer that neither of the rock people were anywhere to be found. He had to do something himself.

So he planned. His first plan was stupid. As was his second. The third plan he came up with wasn't so bad, except that down in this cave there was no way to get the leather he'd need- absence of meat, he thought. That was another strike against caves- and working it with one hand while hanging on to a sharp rock with the other probably wouldn't have gone too well anyway.

The fourth plan had some merit. It really had to work, though. It would be bad enough being the guy who died on a picnic. The guy who died naked on a picnic without his boomerang ... if he had to be that guy, life just wouldn't be worth living. Which would work out pretty conveniently, all things considered.

Very carefully, he took off his tunic and tied it around one end of his boomerang. He knew he was in trouble when he couldn't think of a quick joke about hanging naked from a rock. The stupid cave was even stealing his sense of humor.

He threaded the end of his clothing that wasn't tied up through the hand that was still clutching the stala- what was it, anyway? Gmites for ground, Ctites for ceiling. The hand that was still clutching the stalawsite.

Wishing a lot, he threw the boomerang up at where he desperately hoped the ledge he'd fallen off of was. And quickly lost his grip on his outift. It was all he could do to keep himself glued to the spike. But the boomerang didn't sound like it had hit anything. There was still a chance. He stuck out his arm, praying to whomever was in charge of such things that the boomerang didn't break his wrist as it returned.

As he felt fabric touch his forearm, he knew he only had this one chance of not being the guy who got stripped and murdered by a picnic. He closed his hand around his precious protection from nudity, and got a good grip on it.

The next thing he noticed was the sound of his boomerang crashing on the ground. Without it, he knew there was nothing he could do. At least he could put his clothes on before he died. His clothes, though, seemed oddly heavy. Almost as if they still had a boomerang attached to them. He pulled experimentally at the end he was holding. Definitely a boomerang.

Sokka lowered his arm, and heard the satisfying clunk of boomerang against stone. Doing a few quick calculations, he determined that he couldn't be more than half his own height above the cave floor. There was nothing to do but drop.

His ass hurt where it fell right against a rock, but other than that he seemed to be in one piece. In the face of the cave's recent near-victory, he decided to give up on trying to move. All he would do, he decided, was sit in one place and yell really loud.

"Aang!" No answer. "Katara! Toph! Zuko!" Still nothing.

He sat there.

Peacefully.

Giving no offense.

So it really, really, really wasn't his fault when the earth opened up and dropped him into a pit. This meant, further, that it wasn't his fault when he fell on top of Toph. Really, it was hers. Sokka began to suspect her of being in league with the cave. He was about to tell her so, too, when she interrupted him. Well, she didn't really interrupt him, since he hadn't actually been speaking, but it was still rude. Ruder still when the content of the interruption was "Did you know that you're naked?"

"Of course I know! Do you think it could slip my mind? It's your fault, anyway."

"Why, Sokka! I didn't know you felt that way about me." He could tell that she was smirking at him, even if he couldn't see it.

He tried to go stomp off into a corner and get dressed, but discovered to his dismay that he seemed to be basically surrounded by rock walls. Treacherous cave.

"Look, can you just close your eyes, or whatever it is you do, for a second? I want to put my clothes on in privacy."

"Consider my feet turned off. I'm a gentleman, after all, and wouldn't want to offend the delicate sensibilities of such a fine lady as yourself."

Sokka finished pulling his clothing over his head. ''Shut up." It wasn't much of a retort, but it was as much as a cave-minion like Toph deserved.

“Ready to go?" Toph's tone by itself was enough to make Sokka sure he wasn't.

"Go wh-" The feel of sudden upward acceleration and of rocks attacking his back made him certain that his response had been taken as a yes.

And that was fine. He could get out, and he'd never have to look at another cave again. He and caves could agree to live their lives apart. And as the light grew closer, and the deep darkness started to fade, Sokka knew that it was better this way. The Earth Kingdom would probably get pretty annoyed if he took their caves, and the last thing he wanted was a new hundred year-long war. Better, he decided, to let them have their fun now and not provoke them.

No reason not to let deeping rocks lie. Sokka laughed aloud. It was good to have his jokes back.


End file.
